Crunchy Frog

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"Crunchy Frog" is a fictional confection originating from a Monty Python sketch titled "Trade Description Act", inspired by the British law Trade Descriptions Act 1968. It consists of an entire frog that has been coated with chocolate. In the sketch, a chocolate company executive (Terry Jones) describes the sweetmeat: "We use only the finest baby frogs, dew-picked and flown from Iraq, cleansed in finest-quality spring water, lightly killed, and then sealed in a succulent Swiss quintuple smooth treble cream milk chocolate envelope and lovingly frosted with glucose." Circular reasoning is employed to explain why the bones are not removed: "If we took the bones out, it wouldn't be crunchy, would it?"

Contents

The sketch

In this sketch, Mr. Milton, the owner of the Whizzo Chocolate Company (Terry Jones) is approached by two members of the "Hygiene Squad", Inspector Praline (John Cleese) and Superintendent Parrot (Graham Chapman), who confront him about the odd flavours used in the Whizzo Quality Assortment, accusing him of violating the Trade Descriptions Act through inadequate descriptions of his products. Other flavours include Ram's Bladder Cup ("fresh Cornish Ram's bladder, emptied, steamed, whipped into a fondue, seasoned with sesame seeds and garnished with lark's vomit"), Cockroach Cluster, Anthrax Ripple, and Spring Surprise (chocolate wrapped around two steel bolts that, upon the melting of the chocolate, spring outward and pierce the victim's cheeks). At the end of the scene Milton is arrested, and the Superintendent, who has been vomiting during the entire conversation (it's stated that he ate a Crunchy Frog and implied that he tried some of the others), faces the camera and warns the public to take more care when purchasing their sweeties.

In film

The film Monty Python Live at the Hollywood Bowl also contains a performance of this sketch, with Chapman as the Inspector and Terry Gilliam as his assistant. The assistant is now called Constable Parrot, and while he too periodically leaves the room to fight off his nausea, he remains onstage during his last attack of sickness and vomits into his helmet - which he is then forced by his superior to put back on his head. (Gilliam filled his mouth with cold beef stew when he ran off stage during the scene.)

Other appearances

  • In Monty Python's Big Red Book there is a page designed as a chocolate box insert, with descriptions of all the sweets in the Whizzo Quality Assortment.
  • In J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter series, two kinds of sweets seen eaten by the characters are Chocolate Frogs and Cockroach Clusters.
  • In the video game Fable, the food item "Crunchy Chick"'s description says, "It's the bones that make these crunchy.", a possible reference to Crunchy Frogs.

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